The single greatest question you must ask yourself when surfing through the mire of self-help texts and talking heads is:
Is this provoking me to grow?
You’ll know the answer immediately because it will reflect in your actions. It is a tremendous thing to self-reflect. To stand vulnerable and face yourself for what you really are is no easy task. It is deeply humbling, as it purges the ego. There is nothing wrong with a well-managed ego. We all need one. But, left unchecked it turns on us becoming our master, rather than us mastering it. The bit and bridle of repentance sets it aright. There in lies the impediment for so many of us. The great stumbling block that leads us back on that hamster wheel of deception leading nowhere, all because we fail to be accountable. This is why so many leave themselves vulnerable to Emotional Pimps. Fast-talking, feel good, seemingly eloquent personalities who evoke a shallow deep ideology, although well intended in some instances, leaves its adherence stagnant and themselves, more often than not, enriched. If that’s not pimping I don’t know what is. At best they are vultures guised as doves. They draw you in with their charisma and eloquence, even their personal story seems to resonate so “perfectly” with yours, yet their nature, as is the nature of all creatures of prey, is to zero in on your vulnerability or vulnerabilities. If it’s relationships, at best they’ll advice you to adhere to superficial tropes in order to “nabbed” that special someone. Your series of break ups and dramatic relationships have absolutely nothing to do with you and your efforts (or lack thereof), “he’s a dog…she’s a bitch…” An Emotional Pimp will never ever challenge your culpability; and you’ll be too eager to stay figuratively blind, deaf, and dumb, so as long as it feels good. I am of the belief that it would be impossible for the mega church to exist sans the vulnerabilities of the masses, particularly women. Entire business models have been erected in some of these establishments that do not “disciple…or deliver,” its congregants, but keeps them in a self imposed bondage of lack and stagnation.
Whatever or whoever it is, if it doesn’t edify and call you to account, then it is not at all concerned with your evolution, just your unyielding support.